Salento, Popayan and Ipiales

This tree is a little bigger than it seems

The trip to Salento was a fairly convoluted one. We get a bus at 8am to Riosucio, that takes a couple of hours, then we go onwards to Pereira, with one final change to Salento. Easy peasy, we’d be there eventually, hopefully.

We arrived at the bus stop about 15 minutes early, where we were told in high velocity Spanish something along the lines of ‘The bus will be here at 8.30. Mudslide.’ - or at least, those are the words we successfully pulled out. No worries, we walked over the road so I could grab a coffee at the restaurant at the corner. A few minutes later, the bus arrived. Well, it wasn’t 8.30, so unsure what was going on we asked if it was the correct bus. They accepted it was and we presumed that the mudslide had been cleared quicker than anticipated, but had now told everyone it would be 30 minutes late, so we had to wait regardless.

The bus itself was a little less luxurious than most we’d experienced in Colombia so far. Where most of them had a bathroom, plug sockets and sometimes Wi-Fi, this one had smashed lights and foliage on the seats. Not that we mind, but more we should probably have realised what was coming (and why this relatively short distance of road would take as long as the next leg which was over twice the distance). The roads were narrow, bumpy and just dirt, straight up a mountain. Fortunately no fillings were lost in the process, but it certainly wasn’t a comfortable experience.

Some maintenance required

Around 30 minutes into the journey, and with the driver continually making phone calls, we pulled over for an unplanned stop. At this point, we realised that the aforementioned mudslide wasn’t prior, but now, and their intention was to leave 30 minutes later in order to avoid the landslide. Needless to say, that didn’t happen, when we were greeted by a digger and mud in the road as high as our waists. The driver assured us it’d be 30 minutes of digging and we’d be on our way. Watching the digger unable to get traction in the mud itself, I didn’t have particularly high hopes. Anyway, two hours later we all got back in the coach and we were on our way.

There's a road under there!

Everything was once again going fine, until we reached a spot about 10 kilometres from our destination. At this point, the bus pulled into a driveway and proceeded to reverse out, in the direction we were heading. The road was still clearly one way here, so I presumed he was turning around in order to take another turn nearby easier. Until we passed that turn and continued reversing down the hill for another kilometre and a half. Baffled at this point, the driver announced we needed to change vehicle, and we all grabbed our bags and went to assess what was going on.

It seemed the previous mudslide had simply been an amateur attempt at slowing us down, and now we’d discovered the king of all roadblocks. Balancing our large, heavy bags we proceeded to climb up the fallen mud and across the planks kindly left for us, turning our simple journey into an episode of Total Wipeout.

A slightly larger setback

After finally crossing the ravine, we found ourselves not at another bus, but greeted by a Jeep, already containing several people. We asked if another Jeep was coming, but they insisted all 14 of us would fit, with bags. And sure, we did, with 8 inside, 2 on the roof, 3 in the front and 3 hanging off the back. About halfway along the journey, we pulled up to some people with horses, joking that we’d stopped to pick up more people in the already crowded vehicle. Well, yes, we did, and drove off, now with 6 people hanging off the back. I won’t say it was a comfortable journey, but we did eventually get to our destination, so that was something.

On arrival, we took the next bus to our second leg, which fortunately left pretty soon after, and made for a far less eventful trip. Finally, we arrived at the last terminal, where we’d just about get the last bus to Salento, several hours after we thought we would arrive.

We’d done some research before arriving, and one of the main attractions of the area were the extremely tall and thin palm trees in the area, known as wax palms. Unusually for South America and much to my delight, this involved a 5 hour walk, without a doubt my favourite activity. We gathered some lunch supplies at a supermarket, and hopped in a Jeep (a little less crowded this time, but still with two people hanging off the back) to the start of the walk.

The walk itself was somewhat a mixed bag, consisting of fields, jungle, mud and hills, with a stop around halfway at a hummingbird sanctuary for a drink. We both ordered a hot chocolate. She asked if we wanted cheese. I’m still not quite sure why, but regardless, Diana opted for the with-cheese option like the crazy weirdo she is. Meanwhile, hummingbirds flew past our ears sounding like jet engines. Do you know how many flaps per minute a hummingbird can achieve? I haven't looked it up, but I can assure you, it’s fucking loads.

Humanity upsets me at times

See? Fucking loads

Ever seen a hummingbird being nagged whilst shitting? Well, good news!

This marked 50% of the walk, where the remaining 50% initially started by scaling a mountain, as is tradition around here. Diana ran off ahead, being that this was her idea of fun or something, and left me to get up at what others would define as a ‘normal pace’. At the top, we were greeted by a huge chicken, an ugly dog and fairly adequate views, along with what seemed to be a farm house but with no evidence of whether it was in use or not.

The walk back was primarily down hill thankfully, and passed the star attraction of the area, the wax palms. I had a full expectation of what I’d see when I got here, and I can promise you all, my expectations were not dashed. These were indeed tall trees.

Diana next to a shorter than average Bonsai tree

The way back was fairly uneventful, and upon arriving back to where the Jeep dropped off, we watched some of the drivers racing each other (on foot mind you) to pass the time, and then went to the fullest one in the area for the trip back. It was what I’d consider full, however they said there was room in the front for one and on the back for another. Diana wanted to hang on, so I took the seat and wondered if we’d hit a pothole big enough to dislodge her. We didn’t.

Arriving back in town, we went for a traditional Colombian meal (Curry – I had the tikka masala) and then headed to a nearby bar where we’d heard about a traditional game called ‘Tejo’, where you throw a heavy weight at a target. A target of gunpowder. We arrived and were told the rules – closest to the target gets a point, hit the gunpowder and get 3 points, land in the middle and get 6 points. Hit the gunpowder and land in the middle, 9 points. Easy!

Harder than it looks. Most points were purely from proximity, occasionally we’d skim the target and knock the gunpowder off, but only on a few occasions did we set off a particularly exciting bang. I did finally manage to not only hit the powder, but land in the middle, and had one leave a little pool of smoke behind, so it wasn’t an entire failure on my part. Diana also got a couple of explosions off, but honestly made more of a case for them to rebuild the walls than much else, but she had fun.

Not all misses!

We were headed towards the border, but from Salento it was a fair journey so we decided to break it up a little and head to the town of Popayan. We didn’t know a huge amount about it, other than apparently it was very white (the buildings, not the people), so we decided we’d head there for a day before continuing on. We arrived at about 7pm without a reservation, so we headed for a hostel we knew about and hoped they had a room available. Being fairly late, we headed out hoping to find somewhere to find something to eat, and found they had decided to put on a show for us, an entire orchestra was set up in the centre. A few of the songs were theme tunes from Spanish shows we didn’t know, but we did recognise ‘Piratas del Caribe’ and ‘Juego de Tronos’ (Pirates of the Caribbean and Game of Thrones).

The following day we took a look around and saw that everything was indeed white. We later found out on a tour that this had a good reason behind it – that there was a time when people didn’t have shoes and a foot parasite was rife in the area, apparently repelled by white clay. We also found out that’s why some corners of buildings were made of a rougher brick than the rest of the building, for people to scratch their feet on. Apparently the corners would eventually be red with blood. We believe that times have moved on a little since then, however the building regulations in the area now state that all buildings must be white. Interesting, if not somewhat revolting.

Rough part of town, just check out those staring faces...

Looooovely stuff 

Otherwise, it was a nice place, but nothing to keep us there a lot longer, so we headed off towards the easiest border town Ipiales. Unfortunately no sooner than I arrived my brain imploded, so whilst I slept off a migraine, Diana headed to the only real attraction in the area, a church built over a canyon. At night, when Diana visited, it becomes a crazy light show, which was described to me as being like a princesses castle.

The next morning I was feeling a little better, we took a taxi to the border, and changed up our remaining Colombian Pesos into dollars. We’d heard about scams with this, where they have rigged calculators, apparently they show you a fair rate per dollar, calculate it against the amount of pesos you have, but when they hit equals it automatically deducts a percentage from the total. Fully prepared to call someone out on it, they sure enough produced a calculator, did the sum and… Well, it was not only legit, but the actual market rate. I’m not quite sure why they bother really, they didn’t seem to be making any commission from it, but we were happy with our trade. A two hour queue to stamp out of Colombia (and a 2 minute queue to stamp into Ecuador… Not sure why the disparity!) later, and we were on to our next country!

Medellin, Guatape and Jardin

After another uncomfortable 13 hour overnight bus, we arrived in Medellin and thankfully we could check into our hotel straight away. The lady at reception was lovely but didn't really understand about foreigners who only spoke minimal Spanish, as she used about 20 words to ask us to pay for the room. Intending to have a quick nap before breakfast, which turned into a 4 hour sleep before lunch, and we were vaguely human enough to explore the city. As usual, we left the hotel in brilliant sunshine, which 20 minutes later turned into a downpour, and we had to run to a coffee shop for shelter.

We had heard mixed reviews about Medellin, a city which is mainly known for the infamous Pablo Escobar and the violence and drugs surrounding him. The city centre was a loud, bustling area, filled with market stalls selling everything from shoes and baby clothes to hardcore pornography. Market vendors continuously shouted 'a la orden', meaning 'can I help you/can I sell you anything' but also seems to be a parting statement after your purchase (Could turn into a never-ending cycle of purchasing?)

Only the newest technology here- men ready to type out a letter for you with their typewriters

We headed for Plaza Botero (The guy who makes fat sculptures but insists he is just playing with proportions) when the heavens opened again, and we ran into a free art gallery for shelter. When the rain had died down to a drizzle, we braved it and walked to Casa De La Memoria, a museum and memorial about the crime history and its impact on the people of Medellin. All the graphs seemed to show a decline in the amount of homicides and kidnappings, happy days!

Kinky

Fat boy, fat horse

Slightly off on the proportions..

One of the top recommended activities to do in Medellin was yet another free walking tour. We had to book it the day before as it was so popular, and arrived at the specified time of 10.24am. We were ushered into a group, and introduced to our guide who wrote down our names and nationality along with 23 other people, and instantly remembered them all, impressive. Our guide then gave us a very interesting run down of the history of Medellin, from how the trade industry changed once goods could be moved by train rather than mules, and afterwards how the building of a cable car system around the city made everything more accessible in a very mountainous area. Also, she explained how the city which for a while had the reputation of one of the most dangerous cities in South America, has been working hard to change that image and cut down on crime, changing spaces once known for drugs and violence into well policed modern developments and community areas such as libraries and education centres. However, even with the decrease in crime levels, we were still warned to keep a close eye on our belongings, as some people may still take the opportunity if they see it!

Nice church, although we were then told this is where the prostitutes like to hang out

There were a few more things we wanted to do in Medellin, but we had already booked our accommodation for our next destination, a small town 2 hours away called Guatape. The journey took us from the built up crowded city through lush countryside and mountains. After some difficulty finding our accommodation which involved Jonno running up and down streets while I waited with the bags at the roadside, getting pitying looks from locals, we dropped our bags off and went to explore the town. The apartment seemed to be owned by three ratty dogs and their pre teen female human minion who lived in the apartment above, and every time we entered and left the building they were looking down on us, judging us.

The owners do not approve

On walking through the streets, we discovered a gorgeous, peaceful town, full of brightly painted houses and pictures of people, animals and flowers. Children played on the streets and the town square was filled with cafes and restaurants, giving a very laid back vibe. We took an instant liking to the area.

View from the road

So cute!

Free sports area in the town

The main attraction near Guatape was to walk up the 'Piedre del El Penol', a huge rock with amazing views of the area. The town of Guatape and its surrounding area is built around a man made lake, which branches between hills and creating small islands. We decided to walk the hour to the beginning of the steps, and then the 740 steps up to the top. The view from the top was very pretty, and gave us a chance for a few sweaty selfies.

Big ol' rock

Just a few steps up to the top

Not a bad view

Sweaty!

We fell in love with the charm of Guatape, and if it wasn't for the dark clouds and frequent rainstorms keeping us indoors, we could have stayed longer.

We returned to Medellin, which gave us chance to finish off our intended plans. Medellin boasts an amazing metro and cable car system, and for only 2,000 pesos (50p) we were able to get 2 trains and a cable car to the outskirts of the city, where another cable car transported us from crowded housing with music blaring from various buildings, to thick forests which were eerily silent.

The cable cars

Taking us from crowded city...

...To peaceful forest

Remember- do not prance or bustle about in the cable car

At the end of the cable car track, we arrived at Parque Arvi, a 16,000 hectare nature reserve. Most of the hikes you could do from there had to be guided walks and were all in Spanish, but we managed to find a short 1 hour loop which we could do alone. The walk was called 'The Floral Walk', and while we didn't see many flowers, it was nice to experience the stillness and peacefulness of the trees.

The 'floral walk'

Finally, some flowers!

Another small town we had read about was a relatively unexplored place called Jardin. We arrived to scenes of old men in cowboy hats, smoking and drinking Aguardiente, the local spirit which has an aniseed flavour. Life seems to happen in the village squares in Colombia, with Jardin being no exception. The square was filled with coffee shops with colourful chairs and tables. Old women sat drinking coffee and gossiping, and old men drinking spirits and playing cards. This is definitely the place to retire to!

More cute streets

Has to have a fancy church in the square

Escaping from their wives

Man and his dog

The place we had booked to stay was supposed to be a shared house, but as we were the only ones there we had the whole house to ourselves, apart from an army of ants which seemed to take over the walls at night. The big bonus of the property was that it had an exercise bike and cross trainer, which made me very happy, A girl cannot live on burpees alone!

Emo horse

The hike we had intended to do to a waterfall in a cave (2 of Jonno's favourite things) but it was not clear if the paths were even open, so instead we opted for a shorter easy walk into the countryside. The walk started off fairly uneventfully, the weather was nice and we found a dog along the way that was keen for an adventure and decided to join us on our walk. It seemed to want to chase and bark at every motorbike that passed, so we looked like owners of a misbehaved dog.

Friend!

It started out so well...

About halfway through the walk, we encountered another 2 dogs on the path, who didn't like our dog trespassing. One of them started to attack, and in the fight they rolled down the path, into some bushes on the verge of a fast flowing river. We then heard a yelp, and our dog emerged, panting, and the other dog was nowhere to be seen. We looked down the 10 metre drop to the river below, and saw the crumpled heap of the dog on a rock at the side of the water. Initially it didn't move, but then it regained consciousness and stood up. It was so dazed it just stood staring into the river, not being able to work out how to get back up to the path. After giving Jonno a helpless look, he gave me his bag and started to climb down the rocks, encouraging the dog to follow his path. Eventually it limped towards him and got up the rocks back to the path, still in shock but still alive.

We didn't get a picture of the action, but it went a little like this...

Dazed, but lucky to be alive after the fall

The dog that was with us ran back towards us, but the second dog started growling. This dog was clearly not welcome to pass. It found an American woman walking the other way and decided to take the safer option of walking with her. Sorry pup!

The walk was a little less eventful afterwards

Another activity to do in Jardin was to see the very odd looking bird, the Cock of the Rock, and its mating display at dusk and dawn. It was in private land, where a woman had set up viewing platforms to where the birds came and the males put on a show for the females in the trees below. It was definitely an interesting display, the male birds bobbed their heads up and down then jumped from branch to branch shrieking. Similar to a Friday night in Croydon.

Sorry mate, you just look weird

On our way back to town, we were cornered by a schoolgirl and her mum to help her with her English homework, which was clearly far too difficult for her. This became a learning experience for both the girl and Jonno, who tried his best to translate the sentences into Spanish so the girl at least knew what the words were, before trying to explain how to conjugate verbs.

Jardin was another lovely laid back town, great for people watching and drinking coffee in the square, but we were ready to move further south to our next town, Salento.